If something isn't done quickly, $1 million worth of 100 year-old Jack Daniels may end up like this guy!
This has absolutely nothing to do with sports but I feel it my responsibility to do my part to prevent this injustice. Though Jack Daniels has done more harm to me than good, something needs to be done here.
It seems that the commie pinko authorities of Nashville, Tennessee have confiscated 2,400 bottles of Jack Daniels and plan on pouring it out because they suspect that it was sold by someone without a license. THEY ARE POURING IT OUT! The humanity! And I'm not the only one upset about it:
"Punish the person, not the whiskey," said an outraged Kyle MacDonald, 28, a Jack Daniel's drinker from British Columbia who promotes the whiskey on his blog. "Jack never did anything wrong, and the whiskey itself is innocent."
......
Christopher Carlsson, a spirits connoisseur and collector in Rochester, N.Y., said old vintages of whiskey in their original containers are highly prized.
"A lot of these bottles are priceless," he said. "It's like having a rare painting. It's heavily collected."
Yes, like a Picasso, Van Gogh or Bob Ross. I'm not sure how we can prevent this from going down, but if anyone has any pull in the greater Nashville area, you must stop this. Like Kyle MacDonald said, "the whiskey itself is innocent."
Look behind you, gay 1500's Brian Cashman! Boras is standing right there!
Something stinks in Denmark (and the Bronx).
According to various reports, A-Rod is in talks with the Yankees about coming back despite both sides going there separate ways a couple weeks ago and the Yanks stating that never in a million years would they take him back (I think the exact language was that they didn't want him back because "he doesn't want to be a Yankee"). Lost in the sports talk radio elation of Michael Kay and his flock of sheep for the joyous return of their prodigal third baseman to his true home and where he was meant to be his entire life is the reality of the whole situation. If the folks calling up the NY radio stations today were any indication of the pulse of NY on the situation, New Yorkers believe that they duped Boras and are getting A-Rod for 5 cents on the dollar. They believe he's come back because he couldn't bare being out of pinstripes for another second because it makes him look slimmer. But here's the thing...Nothing has changed! There is no difference between this negotiation and the last time the Yanks lost their $30 million subsidy and said they'd never talk about it again. The Yanks, and A-Rod, are back at square one. The Yanks gained no leverage in letting A-Rod walk and finding out that he may not get his $35 million (a completely unrealistic number that Boras NEVER thought he'd get) because they were the only ones willing to pay the $28 million over ten years he's going to get from them ANYFUCKINGWAY! They are STILL bargaining against themselves only this time feel better about it because they've convinced themselves that it's ok because Boras isn't "negotiating." The only thing that is different this time is the perception that the Yankees are in control. But since nothing in the market has changed (check that, nothing in the market other than the fact that the Yanks promised a catcher $13 million on his 40th birthday). The same teams are still out there willing to pay A-Rod whatever they're willing to pay him. No team is going to play their true hand until the Winter Meetings and even then it may take another month after that to get A-Rod signed. So the idea that A-Rod misgauged the market is way off base. He has no idea what the market is right now. The only thing he knows is that he needs the Yanks at the very least interested in order to get his top value. And the Yanks were steadfast against Scott Boras being in the room while that negotiation took place. So essentailly he's getting paid the same amount but Boras isn't allowed in the room. And if you don't think that the guy who couldn't decide whether or not he was Puerto Rican or American is having his strings pulled by the Satan's Super Agent, you are nuts. The Yanks are going to pay A-Rod more money than any player in the history of sport because Boras and A-Rod have given them the impression that they are in control. It's f'n absurd.
This situation reminds me of one of my favorite quotes. French poet Baudelaire wrote (and was later bastardized and immortalized by Verbal Kint in the classic, "The Usual Suspects")
"The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist."
In two games Jonny Flynn has been dominant, clutch and absolutely excruciating.
In football, there are those players who give you those "No no no no.... YEEEEEEES moments." Guys like Devin Hester and Brett Favre who turn what looks like a ten yard loss or a horrible decision into six in the blink of an eye. They toe the fine line between reckless and genius but have the innate ability and confidence to take the chance and make the play that no one else can make. For all the exhilaration that comes with the great plays, the exasperation that come with the awful plays by these types can leave you scratching your head. Any time these guys are on the field it is a roller coaster of emotions. With that in mind, meet your 2007-2008 Syracuse Orangemen Basketball team.
First, it should be noted that these kids are good. Syracuse brought in the top recruiting class in the land this year and they are no joke. Two of the freshman start, 4 see time and when all's said and done the kid with the most upside (Sean Williams and his 7'9" wingspan) may not even see the floor until next year. The point guard, Jonny Flynn, is Sherm Douglas with range on top of range. After lighting up the senior laden--and likely MAAC champion--Siena Saints for 28 points the previous night, Flynn had a quiet night for 39 minutes and 55 seconds of the St. Joe's game. That was until he knocked down the game winning 24 footer with 5 seconds to play after not hitting a shot all night. Meanwhile, his partner in crime, freshman Donte Greene, began his coming out party with an 18 point game and displayed the range that 6'11" kids aren't supposed to have. The game featured no look passes, deep threes, a ton of steals and strong blocks by hyper athletic kids and when all was said and done the top 3 scorers for 'Cuse were a freshman and two sophomores against a veteran--and very strong--St. Joe's team. But there is a seedy underbelly to all of this flash and excitement.
This Syracuse basketball team is about as reckless and impatient a team as they've ever had... and that's saying something because Syracuse is not known for their methodical and regimented offensive scheme. These guys want to make so many plays all the time they can hardly help themselves but throw an errant pass on a fast break or dribble through three guys rather than make the easy pass. They never run the clock down and play the last 2 minutes of the game exactly the same way they did the first 2. It is infuriating to watch a point guard who has commanded the entire game drive = the lane get a passed picked off in a close game with 20 seconds left on the shot clock. And though their defense (especially their transition defense) was light years better than the previous evening's, they have a ton of trouble recognizing shooters and got tired near the end of the game and gave St. Joe's about half a dozen second chances. Cuse kept letting St. Joe's back in this game via second chances and open looks when they should have put them away with a simple box out. In fact, had it not been for the blown breakaway layup by the St. Joe's dude (his name escapes me), Syracuse would likely have let St. Joe's win this game. And it would have been a deflating loss for these youngsters to swallow, and for me to watch on Tivo (stupid evening Professional Responsiblity class...).
Fortunately, these kids are good. In fact they are really good. Flynn is probably the best freshman point guard in the nation and Greene is just feeling his oats and could go off for 35 on any given night. Onuaku is a man-child in the middle and looks better than anyone could ever have imagined (he may be the reason this team is 2-0 and not 0-2). Paul Harris is the second coming of Charles Barkley and at 6'4" he may lead the Big East in rebounds this year as a sophomore (he's grabbed 14 and 15 in two games so far this year). And we haven't even gotten to Devendorf, who is one of the 50 preseason Naismith nominees and the only player on the court with significant time in the prior to this year. Off the bench they've got a kid in Rick Jackson who if he could break the starting lineup could pump in 15 and 10 a night with ease (he may have the best low post game of any Syracuse player since Seikaly). And Scoop Jardine and Kristof Ongenaet are high upside role players who are finding their way. It's the most exciting team I can remember, even more than the 'Melo and Gerry team because where that team had two great players and little to nothing else, this team has 4 high energy freshman, two physical sophomores and a stud junior leader, all of whom attack the rim like they it just insulted their grandma.
I'm gonna have fun watching this team this year. I'll just have to be sure to keep the Rolaids within reach.
Stephon Marbury went AWOL from the Knicks. He then went LMAO to the Post.
When Starbury didn't show up to the Knicks shoot around in Phoenix this morning it became clear that earlier reports that the Knicks and Marbury weren't seeing eye-to-eye were in fact true. When we later learned that Marbury had in fact left the team (and the state of Arizona), well, that's when things got weird.
First Isiah told reporters that the problem was "in house," then the coach went on to talk about the issue with reporters. He said there was no problem and that he hoped Marbury would be at the game, giving the impression that Zeke thought Marbury was at the very least in Phoenix. The only problem was that unbeknownst to Isiah, Marbury was on a plane to NYC. And when Marbury touched down, he did what any normal professional athlete would do, he immediately texted the New York Post. In this text he told the Post that he received permission from from Isiah to go back to New York, which seems a little odd considering Isiah seemed to suggest that he thought Marbury would show up for tonight's game. It would seem someone's not telling the truth. It's hard to fathom how a civil jury didn't buy MSG's side of the story in the sexual harassment trial given how honest these guys are with the media. God this team is fucked up.
But if you want to know the real truth about the matter, the Smittblog has intercepted the exclusive text message sent from Marbury to Zeke as well Starbury's text to former Knicks intern Kathleen Decker as soon as he touched down this afternoon:
"Zeke, OMG! WTF? YCT ESPN was BS Dawg! GFYMF! GGN, some GLG is gonna SMB. PITMEMBOAM"
Followed by:
"KD, WU? NMHJC. IWSN. RUUP4IT? Meet me at 1174 so I can TTA. LMFAO! SYS."
(if you have no clue what any of this means, here's the cipher)
I've been meaning to post this for some time and while it may not be all that creative or original, the resemblance between Kansas Head Coach and the orginal Fatman William Conrad is remarkable (though not even close to that of Mike Tomlin and Omar Epps). And if some of you youngsters don't know of Mr. Conrad's work, please refer to the below video (such an underrated show).
Josh Smith sure can jump high and he also can act like a 5 year-old.
Maybe I'm old fashioned but when I was growing up only the really good players were allowed to complain about not getting the ball enough. Players like Jordan and Bird were allowed to yell at their point guards for not getting them the ball because for the most part not getting those guys the ball meant your team was going to lose. I guess I missed the memo that indicated that even above-average young players were allowed to scream about not getting the ball.
According to the Detroit News' Chris McCosky, Atlanta Hawks free agent-to-be Josh Smith went all kinds of prima donna on his point guard Tyronn Lue in their loss to the Pistons on November 4th:
During the Hawks game against the Pistons, he (Smith) was yelling at teammate Tyronn Lue because he wasn't passing him the ball enough. He yelled at coach Mike Woodson to get Lue out of the game and had to be restrained by coaches and teammates. When he did get the ball, he often broke plays to get off his own shot. Then, after playing terribly most of the game, he was given a gift of three free throws (on a debatable call against Rasheed Wallace ). After he made the free throws, which only tied the game, he gave the Pistons' bench the stink-eye, as if he did something heroic. The Pistons won the game on the ensuing possession.
Jesus dude. I know you're in a contract year and want close to a max deal, but you're not good enough to yell at anyone let alone your point guard and coach for not getting you the ball. You're a physically gifted chucker (.363 shooting percentage so far this year) who doesn't play good team D but blocks a lot of shots because you get out of position and then compensate with your other wordly leaping ability. It would be nice if someone from the Altanta organization slapped this kid right in the mouth and taught him how to play ball. Too bad there's a better chance that I win next year's dunk contest than that happening.
I agree with this anonymous gay dude. Shhhhhhhhh, Miami.
The Dolphins are the worst team in the NFL and it's not really close. They have no quarterback, their offensive line is a joke, their defense is comically bad and old and they draft like they are shitfaced. Coming into this year their best case scenario was maybe 5 wins. And while no expected them to lose their first 8 games coming into this past weekend, they don't even rank in terms of most disappointing teams of the season with St. Louis, the Jets and San Fran fighting for that label. They suck and everyone knew they were gonna suck. So where does this shitty team get off talking shit?
According to Bills players, with the Dolphins up 8pts in the 4th quarter of a horrendously played game, the Dolphins players started talking shit to the Bills players. And some of the stuff they said just really didn't make a ton of sense:
"'You're about to get beat by an O-8 Dolphins team,'" Bills defensive end Chris Kelsay said one Miami player told him. "Who in their right mind would say that, anyway?"
......
"It's a 60-minute game," Bills linebacker Angelo Crowell said. "I just told my guys not to listen to that nonsense. They were talking like they were up 20."
Wait, so let me get this straight. They were giving another team shit because they themselves suck? That's fucking pathetic. You know things aren't going well when the only thing you can come up with to talk shit about is how bad your own team is. I knew things were going poorly in Miami, but good grief those guys are fucking losers.
You'd be sad too if your team rushed for -18 yards in a game.
I mentioned this last week" but it's worth mentioning again (especially after some negative comments and a couple of really strange and angry emails): the Lions are not very good. In fact, they are kinda awful. Here are some of the pertinent stats from yesterday's disgusting defeat to one of the most average teams in the NFL. In the second half, they had the ball 7 times and turned it over 5 times (once on downs because they couldn't get one yard). They had no drives with over ten plays and only two drives lasted longer than two and a half minutes. If not for the short field touchdown in the first half and the garbage time touchdown, this game would have been an absolute blowout, and even with them it wasn't that close. And the real big number is the rushing yards: Negative 18 yards. Wow. I know I said earlier that this team is not even as close to as good as its record but I really didn't know just how bad they were. They are awful. In fact, just go and re-read my previous post (linked to above). The only thing I got wrong there was that I said Detroit would be favored this past weekend, they were not nor should they have been. It will be a Christmas miracle if they win a single game from here on out (and yes, I'm aware they play Minnesota).
Joe Glenn's guarantee makes Tommy Boy's dump in a box guarantee look pretty good.
Wyoming Head Football Coach Joe Glenn is a bit of a blowhard. He doesn't mince words he loves being in the press and his overall personality seems a little abrasive; especially for a shitstain of a program like Wyoming. So I guess I wasn't all that surprised when I heard that he had guaranteed a victory over Utah this weekend in Utah. I must say that I was a little surprised by the final score: Utah 50 - Wyoming 0. I mean, hole-E-shit that is a shitkicking. And the thing about the guarantee was that it's not like Utah is Syracuse or Temple or Notre Dame or some other awful team. They killed UCLA earlier this year and had won 5 straight coming into the game. And Wyoming pretty much sucks. So how Glenn had the balls to guarantee that they would even be competitive in this game is beyond me. But that's not even the best part....
You see, the Utes were well informed of Glenn's guarantee and let's just say they took it a little personally. Up 43-0 in the 3rd quarter, the Utes attempted an onside kick. And I think it fair so infer that the UTes weren't pulling this stunt because they were afraid that Wyoming was going to make a 44pt comeback. But what really got me about this is that the Wyoming players got all riled up about it because they felt they were being shown up. Here's a word to the wise here fellas, when your coach guarantees that his team is going to go to someone else's stadium and beat that team, that team pretty much gets a blank check to do whatever the hell it wants to on that field. That includes keeping its starters in the entire game and kicking the shit out of your walk-ons to running up the score to having sex with your girlfriends on the field. ANYTHING is fair game. I know the players didn't act like assholes but if you're gonna be mad at anyone, get mad at your coach.
Oh, almost forgot. Glenn also sparked a little controversy for this move caught on tape after the onside kick attempt (Glenn seems like a real stable dude):
That's not steam rising from his head, it's friggin dust.
Like many of you, I hedged my entire season on the aged legs of one Shaun Edward Alexander. I took him with the 4th pick in my draft (after LT, S. Jackson and Addai. Gore & LJ were keepers in our modified keeper league) ahead of the likes of Peyton Manning, Willie Parker, Brian Westbrook and Reggie Bush just to name a few (not that I would ever have taken Reggie Bush because he is one of the most overrated athletes since Dan & Dave). And much like me, your stomach turned as you watched as Shaun rush for 25, 35, 47 and 32 yards over his last 4 games and punch in two total touchdowns THE ENTIRE FUCKING YEAR. He's averaging 3.3 yards/carry on the year and a disgraceful 2.4 over the course of the last 4 games. And now he might not play again this year. Your season is likely ruined (it's a testament to my prolific Fanta C Football acumen that I still have a shot at the playoffs. I am really good). You may as well start scouting college games for next years draft. The problem is that there are 8 weeks of football left (and 6-7 fantasy weeks left) and you can't stand looking at your No. 1 overall pick for another frickin second. So the question becomes: What do you do with him?
Well first of all, you can't start him. Even if he comes back and plays he is FAR too awful to put back in your lineup, even against shitty teams! So he's just gonna sit there, staring you in the face and laughing at you while he makes millions and submarines your cleverly named Fanta C team. It's just not right. Well, I figured out a way to stop Shaun Alexander right in his tracks: You drop him. I know it may seem crazy to drop your first round pick when he has neither a season ending injury nor has he technically lost his starting job, but trust me on this one, it's gonna feel really good. I did it and feel like I have a new lease on life. I know it sounds scary and it may hurt a little but if you follow my instructions and consult my FAQ's, it'll go fine and you'll sleep through the night without peeing the bed (in fact, you may nocturnally emit after reading this. I did).
Here's how it's done: 1. Open the box 2. Put your dick in that box!
Just kidding. I love pop culture humor.
Here's how it's really done: 1. Access your team 2. Click on your league's add/drop feature 3. Click on Shaun Alexander 4. Drop him to the waiver wire 5. Take your pants off (by this point at the very least you will be meaty) 6. Celebrate
See! Doesn't that feel good (and I'm not just talking about step 6)? It's like going to confession after giving that homeless guy a cup of coffee laced with ipecac. It just feels good to get it out there and move on. Sadly, there are those of you out there who didn't get to step 4. I'm not judging. I'm sure you have many questions about the intelligence of such a move considering, amongst other things, that Alexander will likely play again and there's not a whole lot of RB help out there. Well, I've thought long and hard about those questions and I have some answers that I think may help you out:
Q: But Luol, Shaun Alexander isn't really that hurt. He's still gonna get the ball when healthy enough to suit up, right?
SB: First, don't call me that. I hate that name. I know it's my "pen name" but it's stupid and if I hadn't used it this long, I'd change it (I still may at some point). Just refer to me as Smittblog or SB. Second, I'm going to answer your question by posing a question to you: When you watched Saved By The Bell, you were a HUGE AC Slater, right? I bet you were. Your favorite episode was when he broke out his dance moves at The Max (episode seen below). Am I getting warm here? And when you watch this episode, your dick moves. Is this too close to home? Well, there's your answer.
Q: Um, ok. But Smittblog, the Seahawks remaining schedule is atrocious. If Alexander gets back in the lineup, he'll have great matchups. Isn't it worth holding onto him just in case?
SB: Dude, you are such a pussy. I mean, you're really acting like a gayer version of Lance Bass. Drop the fucker for fuck's sake.
Q: That seems a little unnecessary but ok... If we get rid of Alexander, who are we supposed to replace him with. At this point, most decent backups are already off the board. Especially with LJ being hurt. Who takes his spot, smart ass?
SB: Fair question, Sally. Here's what I would suggest you do, take a long hot bath. Treat yourself. Really do it up. Bubbles, jacuzzi, candles, whatever gets you relaxed. And when you're done and really refreshed you can retuck your penis, slip on your blush, open your medicine cabinet and finish the rest of the bottle of estrogen you've been working on.
Q: Smittblog, you're being a complete dick. You're not even answering any of my questions...
SB: Ok, repeat that sentence for me except this time I'm going to pretend to cough throughout the sentence while insulting you. Go ahead.
Q: Ok, this is ridiculous. I've got one final question for you. I'd really appreciate an true answer. Mike Holmgren is a loyal Alexander guy. He's been hurt before and Holmgren still throws him in. He's even put him in around the goalline in games that were out of hand just to pad his stats. Why should we think that Alexander won't get similar treatment at the end of this year. I mean, he's bound to punch a couple in, right?
SB: Wrong. Here's why, I've begun a petition on behalf of all Shaun Alexander owners asking Mike Holmgren to sit Shaun Alexander for the rest of the year no matter how healthy he becomes or how competitive the team becomes so that we Fanta C Football team owners can move on with our lives. After reading the dozen or so signatures on this form, Holmgren is bound to comply with the petition.
So there you have it. If you're still not convinced, start from the top and read this again. If the below video makes your dick move, well, you're welcome.
At 6'11"-ish, depending on who you ask, and featuring one of the sweetest outside strokes in D1 hoops, finding a way to slow down 'Cuse's Donte Greene is going to be a problem.
'Melo just plain knew how to score when he came to 'Cuse. He was 6'8" and 220 when he entered school. Thick as hell with a pull-up jumper and a touch around the rim that was pretty much unstoppable. He was too big and strong for D1 small forwards and WAAAAY too quick for college power forwards. His college career was a one year mismatch. Kevin Durant was a freak in college. Taller, leaner and with better range than 'Melo, Durant dominated the more finesse oriented Big 12 (if I receive a single email regarding the relative toughness in terms of physical play of the Big East compared to the Big 12, I will come down to where you live and punch you right in your ten gallon hat). Durant was the better scorer with a more dangerous game becuase of his length and better shooting touch but 'Melo was probably a little more of a complete player because of his strength (while Durant had more upside considering he had to fill out). Well imagine if a guy showed up who had the outside touch and length of Kevin Durant but the thickness and inside touch of Carmelo Anthony. That's be pretty sweet, right? Donte Greene has that, and possibly more.
In the first half of the first exhibition game that Donte Greene ever played in Division 1 basketball, Donte Greene did this: He scored 16 points on 6-of-10 shooting. He made three of the four 3-pointers he attempted and collected four rebounds. In the following exhibition game, Donte Greene did this: He scored 26 points and was pulled with 12 minutes left in the game. 42 points in about 40 minutes (give or take because he didn't play every minute of the first half of either game). He's shooting well over 50% from 3 point range and he's 6'11", 235lbs. The kid is an absolute freak.
Now, granted, these are exhibition games against DII opponents, but if the exhibition losses of top 25 teams Ohio St. and Michigan St along with the regular season loss of Kentucky to Gardner-Webb are any indication of the competitiveness of these early season matches, the fact that a young 'Cuse team is scoring in bunches and is being led by a guy scoring more points than minutes played, it may turn out that this preseason was a sign of things to come.
Jeff George and the pet caterpillar he keeps on his upper lip are ready to come back to the NFL and chuck it DEEP.
So according to the Pioneer Press, Jeff George thinks he can come back and light it up. Not that this is breaking news or anything, I mean this guy will be able to throw a wad of toilet paper through drywall from 50 yards on his 80th birthday. The league may never see a bigger arm than Jeff George. And while it may not be worthy of a post that Jeff George wants back in the league as this story seems to re-appear every year, it is the manner in which JG made his intentions known is certainly worthy of note. It's not as if George was sitting at home stroking his stache when the phone rang and he picked up and said he'd listen to deals. Oh no. What actually happened is that George was watching Vikes games on the ol' boob tube and after seeing a couple QBs get dinged up--and because he's been throwing to his buddies in his backyard 3 or 4 times a week so he's in tip top shape--he realized that this was the perfect opportunity to pounce. So he did what any reasonable ex-QB would do, he called up the Vikes play-by-play announcer George Allen and asked him to gauge the interest of Vikes coach Brad Childress in retaining JG's services (as if the announcer is going to be able to read the Childress' proclivity for taking fliers on 40+ rocket armed QBs with no conscience just by calling games). The interview that follows from this turn of event is pretty solid. In particular, I enjoyed this quote from George:
"With a running back like Adrian Peterson, I would be licking my chops," George said later. "With that running back, you need someone who can throw that deep ball, and I know I still can. I don't care about the talent at receiver."
I guarantee you that while giving that quote over the phone George was massaging his balls or staring at himself nude in the mirror wearing eye black or doing all of that at the same time. Maybe it's just me but this reminds me a little of a guy from last year you all may remember. Talented wide receivers be damned, all Minnesota needs is a guy who can throw it DEEP! And Jeff George thinks Jeff George is your man to get that ball deep. And he's probably right. Sadly, Jeff's salesmanship has slipped in his old age and the Vikes foolishly went with Koy Detmer instead. And now Jeff has to stew at home and wait for the next round of injuries to pop up. Personally, I could see him ripping it up in Baltimore and injecting some life in a team that still has a shot at the playoffs. Thanks to Jeff and the confidence oozing out of his nuts, at least we know he's ready.
After last week's win over SD, Minnesota realized they are a QB away from wild card contention. After signing Koy Detmer, that remains the case.
The Vikings, for all their flaws, are not half bad. They are 3-5 but they've outscored their opponents this year, they have a kick ass run D and they've been playing without a QB all season. That's better than a lot of teams with QBs. And now that Brad Childress has finally awoken from his two month long slumber and is going to give the ball to Purple Jesus 30 times a game and because they take on the some awful teams the rest of the way, they have to at least be considered amongst the serious contenders for an NFC wild card position. All they really need is someone to take the ball and not throw it to the other team or directly into the ground. 40 touches of A-Pete and the Williams' clogging up the middle on the defensive side with maybe a toss or two downfield to keep you honest... it's not a Super Bowl team but it's better as a concept than about a dozen other NFC teams. If they could get a mistake averse game manager behind center in the vain of a 2000 Trent Dilfer, that team would scare the shit out of anybody dependent on running the ball and not adept at stopping the run. And they recognize this. So they survey the available QB landscape and they come up with... Koy Fucking Detmer. He of the 52 percent career completion percentage and the 10 career tds (Detmer has 14 career Ints). Is that really the state of the in-season free agent QB market? I mean, if you're gonna fill this spot with a Detmer, couldn't you have at least taken Ty?
All that's missing is Stu Scott's, "you see what had happened is..."
ESPN's commenting feature and quasi-Myspace situation has had its ups and downs since it opened up a couple months ago. One of my favorite new features is ESPN's "Featured Comment" on its front page. Every 3 hours or so they will post an actual user's comment on the front page and tell you who wrote it and point you to the story about which it was written. The comments range from the fantatical: "RED SOX NATION CANNOT BE STOPPED" written by Sully4Life to the thought emotional: "Martina Hingis, you were one of the all-time greats" written by HingisUpSkirt.com. And then there was today's head scratcher. A gent who goes by the perplexing sobriquet "natural8blue" wrote the following about Norv Turner:
"Norv Turner is going to waste his superstars' prime years the way Mike Martz did in St. Louis."
Now say what you will about Norv Turner--in fact, you can say anything you want about him. He's fucking awful--but why the unmerited dig at Mike Martz? I know Martz left St. Louis kind of unceremoniously with a vague health issue but I'm not sure I'd call his tenure with the Rams in anyway indicative of underachievement.
First of all, the "greatest show on turf" was Matz's offense. And when he came on board, they had no superstars other than Marshall Faulk. Mike Martz made Kurt Warner a star and won him a Super Bowl. And he took Marshall Faulk and got him in the endzone twice as much as he ever had before he met Martz. Faulk's 3 most productive years were under Martz. I'm not sure you could have utilized Faulk better in his prime. That team won a Super Bowl and lost on a last second drive to the greatest postseason QB of all-time in the other. What more do you want out of a coach? And to top it all off as a head coach, when his meal ticket QB went down with an injury, he threw in some scrub from West Virginia and that offense didn't miss a beat. His ability to prepare Bulger for that situation saved the Rams from a rebuilding process 4 years earlier than necessary.
Now listen, I understand that any yahoo with enough intelligence to navigate the interweb can post whatever the hell stupid shit they want to (see The Smittblog), but what's more interesting to me is that some editor of the content at ESPN felt this comment so compelling and spot on that he flagged it for front page publication when in fact it doesn't make a lick of sense. Mike Martz took his team of overachievers to the playoffs in 5 of his 7 years as a head coach with 3 different QBs. To compare him to a guy who is single-handedly submarining a 14-2 team in a bad division out of the playoffs is absurd and to be honest, a little offensive (pun intended).
I know he's the most productive player ever, but when you cancel the final three years of the most expensive contract of all-time, there is some risk involved. Isn't it time that risk was realized?
I apologize for not writing as much recently. I've been cutoff from editing the site at work, so I can't publish anything from the hours of 8am - 5:00pm. It really bites. Somehow this "upgrade" in web security coincided directly with me receiving a SECOND 19 inch flat screen computer monitor (your tax dollars at work). With that kind of screen coverage, I could've really ramped up my output. Instead, I'm forced to test the limits of Websense and search for proxy sites to get around the new security upgrades. Wish me luck...
Anyhoo, the point of this post is really summed up in the title, so I don't have a whole lot more to add. Well, maybe I can add a little. While I am not holding out a ton of hope that A-Rod gets his ass handed to him in this negotiation and ends up around 23 per year or something, I think 30 million over the course of the contract to be WAY out of whack with reality. If you look at the recent deals of the last couple offseasons, there were some fantastic players signed to big deals who didn't even come CLOSE to 20 million per year. That number is just no feasible any longer. Albert Pujols, a guy who will be on the shortlist for greatest right-handed hitters ever when all is said and done signed a 7 year deal for $100 million dollars... AND PUJOLS IS JUST HITTING HIS PRIME. A-Rod has AT BEST 4 more years of elite play before he will likely enter a period of significant decline. During those years (in the right stadium) he'll probably hit 45 home runs, knock in 130 and hit .300 while playing above-average defense on the left side of the infield before ultimately moving to first. During those years he will probably be considered the best player in baseball, and for that he should be paid as such. But what will that mean?
To be the highest paid player in baseball, all he needs to do is get back to the $25 million range (Giambi is currently the highest paid player at $23 million). If he made $28 million, he'd be making twice as much as Albert Pujols. Is he twice as valuable on the field or at the box office or as a revenue drawer in any market not named New York or Boston? Cuz I gotta tell you, I don't think A-Rod is making $30 million worth of difference to an L.A. team or the Tigers. He needs to be in a baseball town in order to have the kind of impact that Scott Boras talks about. On the field there is NO WAY he is worth $30 million no matter what he does. If A-Rod goes to the Dodgers, those seats will still be empty until the start of the third inning and will re-empty in the seventh to beat traffic. A-Rod isn't going to change an entire culture. Even during his next couple elite years, his old salary would have been too high in terms of comparative value to players across the league. And that's not even getting into the length of the deal. Is there any way a team can justify paying Alex Rodriguez $25+ million when he's 37-38 years-old? I'm sure the average salary will have increased by plenty in those 5 or so years, but even still he'd be getting paid at the top of the grade. It would make sense for him to get $25+ for the next three years and then gradually start decreasing the value to the teens as he takes the fateful turn from 36 on downwards. Sadly, sense is something baseball contract negotiations lack.
I'm not saying that A-Rod doesn't deserve to be the highest paid player in the game from now until 2010. I just think that he shouldn't be paid so much more than the next guy unless he's going to outperform the next guy by so much or unless he is going to add some off the field value to the team he ends up with. If logic were ruling the day, how could you possibly consider paying a corner infielder $20+ million per year into his late 30's when the best corner infielder in the game was signed for half of that at his prime. I am holding out hope that A-Rod will have to pay for giving up the biggest deal of all-time. It would certainly be some pretty sweet justice.
Shameless Sox, Pats and 'Cuse fan. I consider myself fairly objective but harbor an unhealthy (and unexplainable) loathing for Quin Snyder.
Hit me up at luoldang@yahoo.com if you have something hilarious to say.
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