WWSD? He'd Sue The Pants Off Somebody!

Would you look at that! Curt Schilling has an opinion about Clemens and the Mitchell Report!
It's easy to brush Curt Schilling off as a loudmouth blowhard who wants to be heard on every subject imaginable (largely because it's true). He seems to have weighed in on one too many hot button issues for the average sports fan to be comfortable with (one too many meaning "one"). But while it's easy not to like Schilling because of his ways, at least you know EXACTLY where he stands and how he'd react if the shoe were on the other foot.

In a rambling 3000+ word blog vomit, Schilling weighs in on every aspect of the Mitchell Report and the fallout therefrom. But in the part that I want to focus on, Schilling goes into exactly what he would do if he were ever to be brought into this situation and it's something I can't believe no one else has mentioned in their public statements. He'd fucking sue the shit out of people:

"If Jose had named me in his book, it would have taken about 20 minutes for me to issue a press release vehemently denying the allegations, which would have been as closely followed as possible by as large a legal action as I could have possibly taken to sue for slander, libel, defamation of character and anything else I’d have been able to legally do. It’s either that, or I’m guilty. There is no gray area here, you either did, or you didn’t and Jose, up through today, hasn’t called out anyone that’s sued his ass off for false representation, slander, libel or whatever you would do if someone said something like this about you, that you didn’t do."

Now he's gotten a little overzealous with his legal causes but his point is quite clear. If you're not guilty, I don't want to hear your fake apologies or your unqualified denials. If your reputation is being attacked, FUCKING SUE SOMEBODY! And if you don't, IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE AFRAID OF WHAT MIGHT COME OUT WHEN YOU DO. You see, when you file a defamation or slander suit, your character comes into question. You may have to take the stand and at the very least your medical life and private life would receive a fine-toothed combing that you may not be in any way comfortable with.

Searching for a cure for those genital warts? AP will report it.

Had an affair with a male hooker 6 years ago? Your brother-in-law will know.

Developed a heavy coke dependency to get you through road trips? Hope you don't mind your kids finding out!

You file a lawsuit and your whole fucking life is for sale and that's why no one does it.

And sadly, this is where Schilling shines. He may be acting all "holier than thou," but because his peers are some of the least holy fucks on the planet, he is holier than thou!

To get to exactly what Schilling is saying as it pertains to Mitchell though is to get to something I've been wondering all along: If you're a major league baseball player and George Mitchell contacted you or your agent over the last 18 months and said he'd like to speak to you about such and such, you had a pretty good idea that something was up. And if it is true that you didn't do shit, that fucking lawsuit should have had all but one paragraph drawn up and ready for filing on the day that Mitchell came out. That press conference should already have been called and that statement should already be three t's crossed from being emailed to every fucking press member on the planet. Cuz here's the thing, if you are representing someone whose future livelihood is dependent almost solely on reputation and you have an inkling that that source of income is in jeopardy or will be attacked, you have to be ready to fight back the moment you think it's going to be attacked. You have to assume your guy is going to be attacked. The fact that these guys acted "shocked" about this amazes me considering that depth to which Mitchell both documented the acts and attempted to speak to everyone about the acts. When you are famous and you hire people to deal with shit, THIS IS WHY YOU FUCKING HIRE AN ATTORNEY! HE IS SUPPOSED TO BE PREPARED FOR THAT SHIT!

Anyhoo, the major point is that Clemens can bitch all he wants but until he takes someone to court and puts himself out there on the witness stand, I won't believe a fucking word. And what's becoming more clear about this whole situation is that the scumbag Canseco and the blowhard Schilling may be the only two assholes worth listening to from here on out. They are the only ones who have come out (so far) and not had their legs cut out from underneath them. I hate to admit it because I'm not huge fans of either guys, but maybe we should stop believing guys we like and start believing guys who won't shut the fuck up.

*I'm trying my best not to put the non-mitchell people in the same headline or sentence as the Mitchell "buzzwords" so that when idiots do google searches for someone hoping to find out who did roids, the non-mitchell names won't come up.