Just your average picture of a coach and his star track team member. Only it doubles as their wedding photo.
I'm amazed that this hasn't received more nationwide attention yet, but it probably won't be long. ABC has a story on its website about a 40 year-old former North Carolina high school track coach marrying a 16 year-old student-athlete. Apparently the two met when she was 14 (he was 38) and really hit it off. He was her freshman track coach at the time. He started giving her rides places, text messaging with her at 2am and just generally acting like a creep. She fell hard for him and they decided to get married at the age of consent in North Carolina, which I guess is 16 years of age. The kicker is that in order for her to get married at such a young age, her parents had to sign a consent form, which they reluctantly did. They were married on Monday and the coach resigned from the school.
What strikes me most about this is that it's my understanding, at least in NY, that ANY relationship that even SMELLS of shady contact between a student and position of authority in a school is simply not tolerated. If a teacher or coach lived next door to a student and gave him/her a ride home more than once the school would call that person in and let them know that it's innapropriate. Because of the trust relationship between the teacher/coach and student/parent, the teacher/coach has the burden of going out of their way to make sure even the most benign private contact with a student isn't misconstrued. It's just too dicey. So I can't even fathom that the school here didn't stop this in its tracks when the parents contacted them about it when she was 14. At that moment, he should have been told that he cannot have any contact with her in or outside of the school or else the authorities will be called and he'll be fired. More than anyone (except maybe the creepy coach guy) in this situation, I blame them. The reason for such a harsh response is because teenage kids fall for teachers all the time and don't have a clue how to deal with those feelings. If you allow your teachers to take advantage of the kids, the relationship of trust is completely lost and some of those kids will be F'd up for life. If you allow any even mildy creepy activity to occur, your 40 year-old track coach could end up ruining the life of a 16 year-old kid.
With the PacMan situation reaching OJ proportions, I'm sure the Titans players are sick of taking questions about the guy. And it's because of this frustration that the players can be excused if they slip up and make some strange comments when asked about their former teammate. I mean, they don't want to completely throw the guy under the bus. But rather than stick up for his teammate and rally around the cause, Vince Young decided to take a different route to the whole situation. He thinks that PacMan--a man now involved in two shootings and about a dozen other assault probes--is the one who needs to be concerned for his well-being:
"He's got to stay out of trouble and watch his back out there," Young said.
Yes, PacMan's problem is that HE isn't watching HIS back. Not that people need to be concerned about PacMan shooting them when his posse is around. It's PacMan who needs to be worried. Lord knows that the reason for PacMan's involvement in shootings is only a result of him being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Hey Vince, next time you feel like saying something with regards to PacMan, don't.
Even when things are starting to look up, the Orioles season comes and smacks them right in the face.
This is a very imperfect analogy but given that I'm about 4/5ths through a bottle of Allegrini, imperfect is the best I can do. The O's season has gone horrendously. But like our goalkeeper here, they didn't exactly start with the best odds in the world. In the AL East, the O's were supposed to lose. And to their credit, they have done a heck of a job. But like our goalkeeper in the video here thinking ball would harmlessly clang off the post, the O's thought they had weathered the storm. Sure they had no chance and their manager was fired, but last year's NL manager of the was rumored to be on his way to replace him. Then, in less than a 24 hour span, Girardi passes on the gig, their best player, Miggy Tejada, goes down with an injury to his wrist that puts his consecutive games streak in jeopardy and their most talented pitcher, Erik Bedard, goes down with a hamstring injury. Like the goalkeep assuming a goal on a penalty shot, the O's probably could've expected the losing and having their manager fired, but this Tejada & Bedard situation is the proverbial soccer ball in the face. Here's hoping Miggy pulls through this and Bedard isn't that hurt. The O's don't need any more bad news.
UPDATE: Miggy's streak is over. Non-displaced fracture of the wrist. He's out for awhile and Gehrig & Ripken won't have to lay awake in their graves any longer. What? Ripken's not dead you say... Oh.
Even before UVA's Majestic Mapp suffered a series of knee injuries, he didn't really stand a chance.
I once went to a basketball camp with a kid named Richard Upright and the experience left me wondering, what in the hell were his parents thinking? Were they just mean spirited people who wanted a lifetime of pain for their child? As I grew older, Richard Upright seemed tame when held in comparison to the Zappa kids (Moon Unit, Dweezil, Ahmet Emuukha Rodan & Diva Magika), Rusty Kuntz, Dick Trickle, Dick Pole, Exree Hipp, Jhonny Peralta, Wily Mo Pena, Dwyane Wade and kids named Beautiphul, Uneek, GQ, Apple, Knight Sir Lancelot, along with my personal favorite, The Mapp Brothers: Scientific and Majestic. The more I thought about it, the more I realized the blame for these atrocities should be shared. The hospital or government officials should accept some responsibility for cleaning this up and not letting certain things slide. Well, finally someone stepped in and did something about it. In New Zealand, when two idiots tried to name their kid "4Real," the government said, No Thank You:
Pat and Sheena Wheaton said they decided to name their new baby "4real" shortly after having an ultrasound and being struck by the reality of his impending arrival.
"For most of us, when we try to figure out what our names mean, we have to look it up in a babies book and ... there's no direct link between the meaning and the name," Pat Wheaton told TV One on Wednesday. "With this name, everyone knows what it means."
While I do think the New Zealand government did the right thing here, I can see where the Wheatons were coming from. Most names are usually the result of some reference to arcane biblical figures or relatives. That kind of meaning is far less visceral than naming your child after your reaction to a sonogram. I would only have one gripe with this. If the name was meant to reflect the feeling the parents had at the time of the ultrasound, shouldn't the name include a question mark?
Doctor: "Mr. & Mrs. Wheaton, the ultrasound shows that Mrs. Wheaton is pregnant." Wheatons: "4-Real?"
Unlike the NFL, MLB and some other sports, I don't pretend to know a ton about the NBA. I don't write about it, I don't think about it and in general I don't give a shit about it. But there is one thing that I've never been able to figure out with the NBA and that is how they evaluate college basketball talent and project it on the NBA level. And because I love college basketball I feel compelled to talk about it. Here's what I don't get in a nutshell: In every NBA Mock Draft I've seen this year, Josh McRoberts and Spencer Hawes are supposed to be selected before a guy like Arron Afflalo. When asked to compare Afflalo to current NBA players, names like Raja Bell, Bruce Bowen and Morris Peterson are brought up, but Afflalo has a better jumpshot than any of them. If Raja Bell or Bruce Bowen was a threat to score 22pts a game and dish out six assists, they'd be a couple of the hottest commodities in the league (not that Bell and Bowen are not desired players). That's apparently what Arron Aflalo has the potential to become.
As for Hawes, he is compared most favorably to a more athletic Brad Miller (and Vlade Divac) or a far less athletic Al Jefferson if he bulks up and starts to play defense (the latter being a more favorable comparison). If Hawes's upside is Brad Miller with a better handle, he'll have a good career. Brad Miller is an all-star caliber Forward / Center. But like Miller, Hawes can't guard his own shadow and is such a tweener Forward / Center that quicker forwards blow right by him and bigger centers bowl him over. Would you take that over Afflalo who was a three year floor leader for one of the top programs in the country and who you can lock up against the other guy's top 2 or possibly 3 guard while also posing a deadly mid range threat and who even can handle the point if necessary? But if we really want to blow this apart, let's forget about Hawes. How in the WORLD can you say that Josh McRoberts is a better player than Arron Afflalo.
McRoberts is one of my least favorite players of all-time. Right up there with the Rat, Chris Quinn, and one of the ugliest players on the planet, Josh Boone. So my analysis of McRoberts's game should be taken with a grain of salt (not that this entire post shouldn't). McRoberts compares himself to Chris Webber. Sure. I can see that. If Chris Webber couldn't shoot from outside three feet, loathed contact and couldn't rebound worth a damn, he'd be a carbon copy of Josh McRoberts. McRoberts has no back-to-the-basket game, he's got a decent motor and he was 5 for 23 from the 3 point line last year (not to mention he shoots 66% from the free throw line). So where do you put him? Is he Tayshaun Prince? No, because he can't shoot. Is he a less athletic Tyrus Thomas with a better handle? Probably, but what does that get you? At 6'10", you better be able to bang or shoot like Dirk, because there's not that much else out there for you. McRoberts can do neither and he didn't exactly dominate against weaker opponents in the ACC. His decision to leave Duke a year early in year where the group of athletes around his size (Durant, Brewer, Hawes, Horford, Noah) can do so much more than he can and was a really poor decision. These players are so versatile as to expose every single one of McRoberts's many weaknesses. His decision to leave early was the worst since Omar Cook came out.
With all of this said, what really gets me about the scouting process is that guys like Hawes and McRoberts don't pass the eyeball test while a guy like Afflalo does. By that I don't mean that white guys can't play in the NBA (though I wouldn't necessarily be wrong if I suggested it). But when you look at the skill set of Hawes, McRoberts and Afflalo and then look at the guys in the NBA, you see a dozen Arron Afflalo's and you don't see ANY Spencer Hawes or Josh McRoberts. Not one. I know that people try and compare these guys to current players, but nothing works. You want to know why? It's because their college game of "out-athleting" players and getting dunks doesn't translate in the NBA where the bigger guys are quicker and you can't get around them and the "smaller" guys are bigger and you can't back them down.
I understand that the mock draft guys have their ears to the ground and are only relaying what they think is going to happen because of what they are told is going to happen, but shouldn't someone take a step back and try and see where these guys fit in? Because if they did, they'd figure out two of these kids are doing there own thing. And their own thing sucks.
Tiger comes into the U.S. Open looking like John Rambo and three days later the PGA Commissioner is calling for universal drug testing on the tour. Interesting....
First, it should be noted that the PGA is pretty much the last major sport to not test their membership for drugs. So the Commissioner's announcement (a complete reversal of his earlier stance on the matter) that the PGA needs universal drug testing had to come at some point. But I do find the timing of the move--coming on the heels of Tiger Woods showing up to the US Open looking like he could shoulder press Angel Cabrera and Tim Herron--to be at the very least curious. What makes the Commissioner Tim Finchem's comments most interesting are when played against his earlier comments in 2006. Look closely:
PGA Tour commissioner Tim Finchem said he is comfortable with the tour's 13-year-old policy that makes no mention of performance-enhancing drugs. Not only has there been no evidence that steroids are an issue in golf, he said there has been nothing to indicate that the tour should waste time or money looking for such a drug.
"Some say we ought to test for drugs because all sports test and you want to know you're clean," Finchem said. "In a vacuum, I see how you can make that argument. But honestly ... I don't know what we'd be testing for."
And even if anyone discovered a steroid that would allow someone to hit the ball farther or make more putts, random testing would not be the first step.
Golf is built around honor, and that would apply to steroids.
Finchem said if research found there were performance-enhancing drugs for golf, the board would conduct research and decide whether to ban them. Even then, it would be up to the players not to use them.
"People talk about testing, but that's not the question. That might be a subsequent question," Finchem said. "The way you run golf is to pass a rule, and then you expect everyone to adhere to the rule. If we had reason to believe there was a violation, then we could resort to testing."
In particular, I would direct you towards the last part of that statement: "If we had reason to believe there was a violation, then we could resort to testing." Well Tim, you are now resorting to testing. Does that mean you had a reason to believe there was a violation? That is what you said, no?
It's very likely that the prime candidates for the AL ROY haven't emerged yet as Phil Hughes and others have spent some time nursing injuries at the beginning of this year and still have plenty of time to state their cases, but if you were to rank the contenders for AL ROY right now, the Sox would have 3 of the top 5 candidates. I'm not sure it's a record (actually it's not, as the Marlins had 3 of the top 4 vote getters in the ROY voting last year), but I do think it's worthy of a mention. Here's how they rank (according to me) if the voting were held today:
1. Jeremy Guthrie Who? Yeah, JEREMY F'N GUTHRIE. If you're not familiar with Guthrie's work, that's because he plays for the worst team in baseball: The Baltimore Orioles. He's 28 (advanced age due to mormon mission) and was first called up by the Indians in 2004, though his stay did not last long (a "cup of coffee" as Rick Sutcliffe would say over and over and over again. Get a new phrase, Ricker.). He had a couple more cups of coffee with the Indians before being released by the Indians in '06. He threw out of the pen for the O's this year until the unthinkable happened... Jaret Wright went down with an injury. In his 8 starts since joining the rotation, Guthrie has pitched 6 innings or more in all of them and hasn't given up more than 3 runs in any. He is also undefeated (2-0 in 8 starts, thanks O's). His ERA and WHIP are both 2nd in the A.L. and players are hitting .210 off him on the year. If he were on any other team he'd be 6-0 at least. As of today, Guthrie is the ROY. Unfortunately, even if he stays within spitting distance of his current pace, he's going to finish the year with a losing record, he doesn't have killer K numbers (due to his early bullpen stint) and when compared against the other rookie contender (Dice-K) at least with regard to those two stats, he'll get killed. Guthrie would win if we were voting today, but he doesn't have a shot unless he can keep his ERA under 3.00. That ain't happening in Camden.
1A. Hideki Okajima With apologies to Pat Neshek and Dan Haren, you could make the argument that Hideki Okajima has been the most dominant pitcher in baseball this year. In 32 appearances, he's given up 4 runs. He's only given up 19 hits all year and only two of those were extra base hits (one those, a home run by John Buck, was off the first pitch of his career). He also benefits from playing on a good team and Tito will use him in situations where the game is either close or tied late, so he has the chance to pick up a few cheap wins. And while the ROY isn't as dependent on your team being good as the MVP vote is, because of his position and because of the Sox exposure, it is more likely both that Okajima can keep this up and that people will ngive him credit for the Sox success than it is that Guthrie keeps up his pace and he stands out in Baltimore enough for people to take notice. If Guthrie slips at all, he will fall completely off the ROY radar and Okajima will have an open door.
2. Reggie Willits The Angels' Reggie Willits is probably more of your prototypical candidate for ROY. He's on a good team. He's one of the reasons this team remains good and he's not doing things so out of the ordinary for this good team that he can't keep it up. His pace is reasonable. Prior to Monday, Willits had hit safely in 38 of his last 50 games, while reaching base safely in 43 of 51 games with an at-bat. He is first among American League rookies in batting average (.329), on-base percentage (.433), runs scored (34) and stolen bases (16). His 57 hits are second among his rookie peers. He's not doing anything terribly terrific, but if he keeps this up (and especially if he gets near 100 runs) and if the Angels make the playoffs, he probably has the best shot out of any of these five to take the award.
2a. Dustin Pedroia Pedroia is a bit of a longer shot. His most significant problem is that he'll be compared to Willits and Willits has been a little more consistent. After starting the season off with a .182 average in April, Pedroia has been absurd. He blistered the month of May with a .415 average and OPS of 1.072, earning rookie of the month for May (Okajima won ROM for April). He has calmed down a little this month but is still hitting .340 for the month and .320 overall. He doesn't have big power but he's got 3 home runs to Willits's zero, has almost double the amount of doubles that Willits has and has the second highest OPS amongst rookies. He's also playing a solid 2B and is on a team that is on their way to the playoffs. Pedroia is probaly the longest shot of all these 5 candidates but if he can get his HRs into the 12-15 range, hit over .300 and drive in 75+, he's got a decent shot.
3. Dice-K The Gyroballer is the wildcard in all of this discussion. Dice-K, while not piching up to his standards (or the standards of his country and hype), has pitched pretty solidly. He's top 5 in K's, he's top 20 in OPS against and in his last 3 starts he's given up 2 runs or fewer and struck out an average of 8.3 while pitching 6 and change. So it's possible that he's getting better (it's also possible that he just likes pitching against Oakland and the NL). The big Ace in Dice-K's pocket is the fact that he has a legitimate shot to win 20 games. He's 8-5, pitches deep into games and has lights out relief behind him and a good lineup getting run support for him. If he wins 20, that may be game set and match no matter if he has a 3.50 ERA or a 5.00 ERA. He has the highest upside of any of the candidates (including the honorable mentionees) and with his experience, he is probably even money with Willits to take it home.
Honorable mention goes to: Travis Buck, Alex Gordon, Phil Hughes (maybe) and Delmon Young (if only he wouldn't strikeout everytime he stepped up to the plate. He makes WiMP look like Ty Cobb).
I'm not saying it is likely that the Sox will finish 1, 2, 3, but it is possible and it has left me with some questions: How many teammates ever finished 1, 2 in the ROY voting and what is the highest number of players from one team have to have finished in the top 10? Seriously, I'd like to know.
Can a washed up, cracked out Henry Rowengartner (Thomas Ian Nicholas or "TIN" as he'll be referred to throughout) come back from Tommy John surgery and lead the Cubs to glory? Find out in "Rookie of The Year 2."
It's amazing what you can find on the internet without really trying... I was researching for another post I'm going to try and put up tonight when I stumbled upon an idea that is so amazingly spectacular that it deserved its own post: Writing a sequel to Rookie of The Year. The concept has a ton of potential and in fact, a rough script is already in the works (albeit a VERY rough and VERY amateur draft from IMDB):
"Rookie of the year 2- It still could be done. Henry could now be a washed up veteran even though he's only 25. By now, he's had a few run-ins with the law, a painkiller addiction, and Tommy John surgery. He's demoted to the bullpen when a new young stud comes up from the minors. The kid's got real talent but some maturity issues. Henry teaches him how to avoid trouble after finding success so young and to avoid the mistakes he made. The Cubs could sign Manny Ramirez and then the kid could carry them to the World Series. In game 7, Henry must come in and close the game against.....Heddo's son who's just entered the league. Of course, Henry strikes him out(like father, like son) and retires. Henry marries Becky and and becomes manager of the Cubs, leading into ROY 3. What do you think?"
What do I think? Allow me to clean the pre-cum off my shorts first and gather my thoughts! That is frickin genius! I really love the Favrevian "painkiller addiction" angle and can picture a hungover, half-bearded TIN (Thomas Ian Nicholas) watching the Bartman game, slinging 95mph beer cans across his filthy apartment at a picture of Becky who left him with the kids 2 years prior. TIN would obviously be wearing a Norbit-style fatsuit and dating an overweight and abusive "woman" (played by TIN wearing a fatsuit and wig). It would essentially be like a white guy version of Martin, but funny. We could get a Rocky-like montage to get TIN in shape. I'd also like to consider (I'm not married to the idea, so criticize if you must) working in some Freddy Prinze, Jr., Summer Catch 2 angle. That premise may require a movie of its own. But we better work quick, there are several ideas up on IMDB that are worthy of consideration. Call me crazy, but this could actually work. And if you do think I'm crazy, when it comes to ROY 2 talk, "crazy" is a relative term:
"I'm doing a dynasty mode with the Chicago Cubs in MVP Baseball 2004. I created Henry and brought him in as the teams closer. My storyline stemmed off of Henry pitching in high school. He's a hit with the local newspapers but every expert predicts he'll never make it to the MLB w/o his special arm. Henry has changed in character. He's no longer a clumbsy loser but has grown into a hot shot athlete with all the confidence in the world. Henry's character becomes a lot like Derek Jeter with the pretty boy status of Tom Brady. Henry brings with him a highly competitive edge in which he comes in does what he needs to do and it's over, he wins, they lose.
Henry is drafted right out of high school to the Chicago Cubs off the 14th pick. He begins in Minor League A and in no time proves he can throw. He's upgraded to AA and he's still whizzing pitches at around 98-104. He's again upgraded to AAA where they often try him as the teams closer. He's off and on in AAA for a while as the media begins questioning the MLB Cubs when Henry's coming to the MLB. They also question the Cubs marketing tactics. The Cubs are once again struggling with ticket sales and could use the tickey boast. At the time Henry's still slumping in AAA but quickly improving. At this point Henry's beginning to feel the pressure and lose confidence. The Cubs in need of a bullpen decide they'll bring Henry in. The entire sports media from all over the country air the story. Everyone on ESPN is in heavy debate. In Henry's first game and this actually happened in the game... Henry holds the Pirates to no hits in the top of the ninth only to bat successfully in the bottom 9th and get batted in for the winning run off a close call at home plate. From there Henry begins as the Cubs regular closer doing a very great job. The new conflict comes in the form of jealousy as many of the Cubs players cannot stand his instant hype. Not before long Henry is the media darling and the Cubs are fulfulling Wrigley sellouts. As things continue a new breakout closer begins competing with Henry. Where Henry has the big time "Rock Star" (Brady/Jeter like)feel where his rival is self-promoted premadonna "Prime Time" pitcher who walks around like he's Deion Sanders. They fued all season in the bullpen but Henry ultimately prevails striking out 5 out of 6 hitters leading the Cubs to victory over the Cardinals. The major conflict of the story being Henry vs. Himself and Henry vs. the criticisms of his teammates and the media.
By season's end Henry becomes "Rookie of the Year" once again!"
People on the West Coast are just rolling out of bed and we've already had a rumored manager firing, a potential blockbuster baseball deal going down (Buehrle to the Mets for Pelfrey and Milledge) and now PacMan Jones is being sought in connection with a shooting outside an Atlanta Strip Club.
DeKalb police confirmed they want to talk to the College Park native [PacMan Jones], whose entourage got into an argument with three other men about 4:16 a.m. at Club Blaze, a Moreland Avenue strip club, according to Officer Ariel Toledo, a department spokesman.
When the men with whom they argued left the club, Jones's entourage followed them in two vehicles police identified as a green Dodge Charger and a black Pontiac Grand Prix.
Someone from Jones' entourage allegedly shot into the vehicle they were following, Toledo said. Someone in the victim's car returned fire. One person in the victim's car suffered minor injuries from shrapnel, but refused treatment, Toledo said. The gunfire exchange happened near I-285.
To me, this is simply amazing. All PacMan has to do to get back into the league is spend a year without going to a strip club, essentially. Instead, he's at a strip club on Father's Day with his boys and their guns.
At this rate, before day's end, Chris Henry, Tank Johnson, Lawrence Taylor and Elijah Dukes will be linked to the Lindbergh baby disappearance and the Anthrax letters. Hold onto your hats....
Buster Olney just announced on ESPN Radio's Mike & Mike (and was confirmed here) that Cubs President Andy McPhail is stepping down and is likely taking the CEO of Baseball Operations for the Orioles. Buster also said that Angelos is interviewing Joe Girardi today and considering his history with McPhail, it would seem all the dominoes are in place for the end of the Perlozzo era and the beginning of the Joe Girardi era. This may also signal the end of the Miguel Tejada and Melvin Mora era as both surly players will not really mesh with Girardi's no-nonsense style. The next month or two should be interesting in Charm City.
I hear ya D-Cab. I hate the O's and even I'm starting to feel bad for them.
In Buster's blog" today it was suggested that Sam Perlozzo could be the first casualty of the 2007 season. This had been whispered about for a couple of weeks but I really couldn't believe it because this team is not a manager coach or anything but a complete roster overhaul away from competing for a wildcard spot. If anyone should be fired it should be Peter Angelos for being such an incompetent joke of an owner. But I think I've started to buy into it after reading some of the players' comments that could double as eulogies:
"I don't want to be in the manager's shoes right now because it's kind of hard for him," said Mora, who publicly criticized Perlozzo earlier in the season but last night came to his defense. "He's doing everything he can to try to win some games. We try to talk to him about something different so he could forget about it, but sometimes it's hard."
"We have to find a way to come out and prepare ourselves everyday to win a game," Patterson said. "I like Sam. He's always been fair to me. I respect him and he respects me. ... We'll keep fighting hard for him and he'll do the same thing for us."
When a player on a sports team utters this phrase: "You know coach/skip/Joe can't hit/run/block/throw/shoot for us out there. That's on us, not him." The following week usually contains some kind of management change. But if that wasn't enough, this quote was sure to seal Perlozzo's fate:
"This is our fault, we're letting everybody down." Or to say, more importantly, "We're going to fix this."
Between now and tomorrow's opener of a six-game West Coast swing, there apparently will be a players-only meeting.
"Me. Kevin Millar will lead that meeting. ... That's who's going to lead the meeting," he said.
Yikes. A Kevin Millar players-only meeting. Maybe it is time for a change in Balto.
If you weren't paying attention this weekend, or didn't have a chance to read any of the good blogwork done on the subject, you likely missed that the Skins' LaRon Landry had to miss the first day of minicamp because he took a paintball to the junk. I don't really have a lot more to add other than it just figures that this would happen to the Skins given their history of bizarre injuries (Gus Frerotte gives his regards). I did enjoy Joe Gibbs take on it though:
"It was kind of bizarre, but every now and then something like that happens," Gibbs said, adding that he considered the injury a freak accident and had no plans of barring his players from paintball games.
Yeah, missing your first minicamp after getting hit in the nuts with a paint projectile is "kind of bizarre." And Michael Strahan is kind of gay.
Shameless Sox, Pats and 'Cuse fan. I consider myself fairly objective but harbor an unhealthy (and unexplainable) loathing for Quin Snyder.
Hit me up at luoldang@yahoo.com if you have something hilarious to say.
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