Saturday, April 28, 2007

Live Draft Commentary

If it wasn't 15 minutes before the start of the draft, I'd amend K.C.'s pick to include this fella. He's multidimensional, great peripherals and strong character guy ("teammate first").

7:30 - I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that Mo closed the game out and the Yanks won 3-1. He isn't dominant (nobody swings and misses anymore), but even his third rate stuff is better than about 3/4 of the closers out there.

7:10 - I can't help myself.... Tim McCarver is telling Joe Buck that the MLB should adopt a mandatory Yoga policy in order to prevent all the pulled hamstrings in the Majors. First, I didn't realize there was this pulled hammy epidemic and second, why the F is Yoga going to help anymore than general stretching? Lastly, McCarver is the last person I would ever expect to promote something like Yoga. He's a curmudgeon if ever there were one.

7:03 - One last post (maybe last), the called third strike on Coco to end the 8th by Bruce Fremming was so far outside it was almost a passed ball.

6:27 - Last post of the day. Belichick is on with Berman right now. He is not exactly the best interview in the world (that may be a wee bit of an understatement). He just says the same thing over and over again. Then he cracks a really bad joke about Berman and nicknames. I'm very glad his job is not to entertain. He is about as exciting as chicken salad. Branch and P squared go 1-2 in the second round and the first round riff raff will likely follow. Paul Posluszny at this spot is fine but Branch is a steal in the second round. If there was ever a question about Branch's motivation, how does getting skipped by every team in the league sound to you for motivation? Branch was a top 8 pick 2 weeks ago.

This has been really long. I'm taking a nap. I'm sure I'll have more to offer tomorrow. Today, I'm spent.

6:22 - Igawa has pitched a 6 inning one-hitter so far (now 2 hitter). He looked good today (I say "looked" because he looks bad in this inning). Then E-Rod comes through with a nice error to start the 7th. Another one of those, April turns to May, the boo birds come back, Heyman writes his first "Trade A-Rod" article for and it will all feel normal again.

6:18 - How is the theme music for each team at Radio City selected? It's easy for some teams ("New York" for the Giants, "Rocky" for the Eagles) but they were just playing the Cougar for the Colts. If I were a Colts fan, I'd be irate. Is that the song that best represents Indianapolis? If so, that's horrendous. I would be ashamed to be from Indy after that.

6:15 - A-Rod's up with the bases loaded. This should go well. (He popped out).

6:10 - Greg Olsen looks like every asshole I hated in college. He and the Rex Machine should get along nicely.

5:51 - My fantasy bass team shit the bed today. Pete Ponds in particular. Ponds was fifth after yesterday and today he only grabbed three fish and is currently at 40. Thanks, asshole.

5:46 - With Mo unavailable, I don't think the Sox are gonna be able to come back tonight (that joke will never get old).

5:39 - Sox game again, two horrible plays in a row. Lowell, who has been awful in the field this year. Booted a potential double play ball (at least an easy out) and then Abreu gets up with no outs, 2 on and lays down one of the worst bunts I've ever seen. There is no way Torre called for that, unless he's trying to get fired (which may be the case because he also sent Jeter with one out from second and ended a rally with a strikeout and throw out of Jeter). Abreu is batting third for the NEW YORK YANKEES. You don't bunt. And you especially don't bunt when you suck at bunting, which he clearly does.

5:25 - I can't believe how right Michael Smith has been today. Maybe it's just that he's sharing a room with Mark May and Sean Salisbury (Salisbury, by the way, may be the only person on the planet with a bigger hard-on for Calvin Johnson than myself). He said that Jax and Carolina both had the best first round of anybody because they got their guys and got extra picks. Exactly right, Michael. I think that's a no brainer. Michael Smith is much smarter than his creepy and uglier lookalike, Eric Allen (pictured to the left. I told you he looks like an ugly version of Michael Smith.).

5:09 - The Yanks should just not tell Igawa he's gonna start and surprise him with starts every time. He look great coming in after Karstens got pulled with the injury. With all the advance scouting that goes on by teams, maybe this is a new way to combat against the scouts. Don't tell anyone who you're going to start, even the starters. There's no way a team can prepare for all 12 guys in the bullpen everyday. Lastly, someone should tell Igawa that in America, unless you're Jim McMahon, sunglasses are used to block out the sun.

5:07 - And then they go and pick Anthony Spencer. I guess I could've seen New Orleans, Indy or Detroit taking him. 3 picks just seems like a lot to give up.

5:03 - Steve Young is now bitching about the music being played over the PA at Radio City. He is just angry today. Also, Philly just anally violated Dallas with their most recent trade. You have to think that Dallas wants to move up to grab Meachem, but is he really so much more valuable than the guys that would be left at the early second round spot they gave up (8 picks later) to justify giving up 3 picks?

4:53 - Home plate umpire Bruce Fremming is mic'd up in the Sox - Yanks game. I feel like this feature is being way underutilized. I'm sure some hilarious things are said at home plate and by the catchers to players. But Fox only uses it when the umps are doing really mundane things like giving loose balls (ha!) to fans or things like today where Bruce took us on a "ground rules tour" of Yankee stadium. Let's just say it wasn't electrifying. Joe Buck then told us that Fremming was a candidate for the Cubs broadcasting team. After listening to Fremming bore us through the stadium, Fremming in the broadcast booth is the only person who could possibly be worse than Suzy Waldman or the White Sox broadcasters.

4:47 - Whoa! The Pats take Meriweather. That's an interesting pick. He's a low character guy (two major incidents including a hand gun problem) who Belichick feels he can handle. Jeff Fisher probably thought he could deal with PacMan last year, so this is a little risky. They have a ton of veteran leaders on D, so maybe it will work out, but this pick is a little shaky for my tastes.

4:42 - A-Rod just ran away from a flying bat like a 4 year-old girl running from a bee.

4:40 - Apparently the deal between between Dallas and Cleveland was made much easier by the fact that Phil Savage and Jerry Jones share a similar southern drawl. Savage cited the fact that the two of them "talk the same way" as a reason for the smooth transaction. Maybe that explains why he gave up the farm for him. Though I do agree with Savage's line of thinking that if they didn't grab an QB this year, they would likely have to next year and since they were considering taking him third and weren't enamored with next year's crop, why not get a guy you can coach for a year and sculpt even if he isn't going to play. That'd be better than a decent QB in next year's draft.

4:33 - Back to the Sox game, McCarver just told us that Sumo wrestling is the only sport more popular than Baseball in Japan. Who knew?

4:16 - Our long national nightmare is finally over. Brady is going to Cleveland. And thank God. Now Steve Young is comparing Brady Quinn to Dan Marino. He went from overrated to underrated to overrated in a hearbeat. That was a fun ride. And Dallas got Cleveland's No. 1 next year? Whoa. No pressure Brady. I hope you like the weapons already on that team because that's it until 2009.

3:58 - HEY! The Giants made a good pick. I would have taken Eric Wright, but the Giants need so much help in the secondary that you can't fault them if this was the top guy on their board. They probably did not expect him to be here, so they must be pretty pumped. And Jeff Karstens just took one off the knee that looked so painful my knee started to throb. YEEEEEEEEOUCH FORBESY!

3:42 - It is possible that Brady Quinn could fall to Baltimore or even Chicago if Dallas or K.C. doesn't take him. I can't even imagine him falling past Dallas, but it is certainly possible. If he fell out of the first round, do you think he would go out onstage and punch Gene Washington right in the mouth?

3:34 - Justin Harrell to Green Bay and Jarvis Moss to Denver. Love both of these picks. Steve Young hates this pick. He agrees with Keyshawn that it's essentially a slap in the face of Brett Favre to not surround him with talent. Young and Mort are really going at it today. Two times Young has thought the mic was turned off and was heard shouting at someone at the table. He seems awfully ornery today.

3:10 - Ok, I've officially come around on Brady Quinn. He was pretty candid in his most recent interview and seems like a good enough guy. Plus, I really feel bad for this guy, kind of. This whole draft process for Brady has been handled poorly. Let's look at it: He skipped the Senior Bowl, his reps didn't have him participate in the combine other than to bench despite the fact that people had concerns about his attitude and accuracy, he looked ok at pro day but not great and then when his agent realized he was slipping, they whored him out to the sports talk show circuit to promote him as a pretty face begging for a spot. I don't think they'll be using this experience in the next class of "how to market a QB 101". If I'm a player coming out in future drafts (and I'm actually thinking about throwing my hat in the ring next year), I think long and hard about having Tom Condon handle my affairs.

3:06 - Keyshawn has officially derailed. He just said that Green Bay needs to take LSU's Dwayne Bowe in order to help Green Bay move into the next millenium. Yes, Dwayne Bowe should be a star at least through 3010.

3:04 - Rachel Nichols is acting like Uncle Junior Soprano. She just repeated the same story (verbatim) about Steelers coach Mike Tomlin for the second time. Maybe she's contractually required to tell the story once every hour.

3:02 - Brady Quinn is backstage right now receiving a lindy slinger.

2:55 - The Jets trade up for Revis to prevent him from going to the Steelers. They needed a corner so whatever. The ESPN crew felt that they did it to prevent the Pats from moving up to take him. I find the idea that the Pats were going to move up to grab the smallish Revis when there's enough comparable talent at their slot to be a little far-fetched, though I do like the idea that Pats baited the Jets into giving up their first two picks for him. That makes me happy in my pants.

2:32 - If I had been in the room when someone proposed this idea: "Ok, picture this.... giant clear orb full of giant, colored and numbered ping pong balls, screaming studio audience, catch phrase 'pull that triggah!', a guy in a referee uniform speaking with a broken english accent who also has a catch phrase ('No Bingo') and a no name host with a british accent from a relatively succesful show where he wasn't even close to a star--I call it: National Bingo Night! Whaddaya think?" My reaction would have been similar to the woman who sees her nude husband stand up from the tub and do the "Spongebob no pants" thing. Wow indeed. In fact, I may have had security escort them out of the building. That show looks almost as bad as "The Rich List".

2:27 - Marshawn Lynch is fine by me being that I'm a Pats fan. Last year the Bills were a player or two away from competing for a playoff spot. They lose Clements and McGahee, and then pick up Marshawn Lynch (who is described at being "pretty good")? Go right the F ahead. That is a net downgrade, big time. The Bill had to pick up an RB, but after losing Clements and having EVERY CB still on the board, the Bills should have sured up the D-backfield. Maybe they think they can get McCauley or Ross in the second round, but this pick is gross. The Bills are officially out of the playoffs.

2:15 - The Brady Quinn experience just got even more awkward. They had to move him to a special room setup by the commissioner to take him away from the media coverage. I don't know if this makes it better or worse. While it was painful to watch Aaron Rodgers and Leinart slip, at least it was impressive to see them sit through it and take it. By hiding him, they are kind of reinforcing what people thought that Brady is just a good looking dude who can't stand up to the pressure.

2:11 - The fact that Mark May hates Amobi Okoye makes me think that he is going to be one of the best players in the NFL. Mark May is one of the worst talent evaluators in the history of the draft. I would love to see the "small" Okoye line up across from Mark May and beat the ever-loving shit out of him.

2:08 - Two man-crushes down, 4 to go. Houston really lucked out with Okoye falling to them. They have to be ecstatic. They were probably thinking they may be forced to take a run at Branch but this couldn't have worked out better. Their defensive front is starting to shape up with Williams, Okoye, Weaver, Travis Johnson, Ryans and Greenwood.

1:58 - Chris Berman just dropped the bomb of the draft: Brady's girlfriend is named Lindy Slinger. That is unfortunate. Shouldn't she be Rex Grossman's girlfriend? I'm going to stop making fun of the both of them because this is just getting awkward.

1:51 - HOLY SHIT! Ted Ginn? Are you fucking kidding me? I don't think Brady is a top ten pick but didn't they have to take him? Ted Ginn is an injury magnet. He compares favorably to Terry Glenn and Charles Rogers. This is horrible. I actually now feel bad for Brady. Not as bad as I feel for Dolphins fans though. That is one of the worst picks I've ever seen.

1:45 - Jamaal Anderson is gonna end up being a "blah" pick by the Falcons. Pretty athletic, decent motor, whatever. He just wasn't dominant enough to be a top ten pick. If you're gonna take a run at a stud, why not Jarvis Moss? He has much more upside than Anderson does.

1:42 - I enjoy the fact that the players can hear the broadcasters talking about them while they wait to be picked. I wish that were the case in the real games. I would love to see player reactions during the heat of battle when Troy Aikman calls a throw "stupid" or Baldinger carries on about a stupid penalty or missed block. To me, that would be funny.

1:38 - Here's a problem I have with the "Brady doesn't care where he goes" philosophy. If he didn't care, why was he defending himself all week? He was not going any later than Miami anyway, right? So what was he doing going on the talk show circuit? Wouldn't he only do that to explain to people why he should move up? I don't just think that Brady cares where he goes, I think he cares more than anyone.

1:31 - Anyone know anything about Admiralty law? I've got a final on Monday and some of this stuff I'm reading might as well be written in Korean.

1:27 - I love the highlight of the Vikings delaying their pick for 3 picks. That was so bizarre. The best part, in hindsight, is the video of Vikings fans getting all pissed when the pick finally came in with Kevin Williams. Kevin Williams is one of the best D Tackles in the game. Vikings fans are so dumb. So so dumb.

1:22 - If Minnesota doesn't take Brady, this could get really fun. I foresee tears. I don't usually enjoy other people's pain this much, but Brady brought this on himself by politicking all week.

1:20 - Steve Young tells us that Adrian Peterson's nickname is "AD" for "All Day" because he's such a hard worker. Wow, another hard worker in the draft. Will wonders never cease.

1:18 - Skins take Landry. Great pick. Love this guy. This means that Okoye is likely to fall to at least 8 and probably 9. Someone's getting a steal.

1:15 - Keyshawn is not mincing words and is not making a ton of sense. In one lengthy, rambling sentence he tore apart Steve Spurrier's draft, called the Skins old, mentioned that he watched one highlight tape of Landry and said he had great "attention to detail" and was a good player because he planted a quarterback one time. I love Landry more than anyone, but I think he's just better than everyone and great safeties are difference makers. The Skins should know that better than anyone.

1:09 - So far, I have to say that this may be the smartest draft on record. I'm not sold on Gaines Adams and would have taken Okoye if I were the Bucs, but they addressed a need and got the top-rated guy. Not trading up for CJ was a amart decision. Also, the fact that Brady Quinn is sitting there with a mix of hair gel and sweat beads dripping down his face is pretty entertaining. Plus, I really enjoy his get up. Three piece suit sans jacket so only two pieces are showing. Pretty sharp.

1:05 - Michael Smith was right (he's been right all day) and AZ picked Levi Brown. I am so nervous about the Skins pick. They either need to take Okoye or trade down. I can't imagine what else they would do. I have several friends who are almost ready to vomit.

1:02 - Lot o' discussion about the AZ pick. Salisbury is INCENSED at the idea of Levi Brown being a better pro than Joe Thomas. Didn't people say the same thing about D'Brickashaw Ferguson and Marcus McNeil?

12:57 - I am loving the family members on the stage this year. Gaines Adams's family looked like they were coaches at the Pro Bowl. Green hawaaian shirts and khakis.

12:55 - Berman breaks out his first nickname of the draft: "No Gaines" Adams. God help us.

12:52 - Keyshawn just took a verbal dump on Chris Weinke. Keyshawn, in explaining why the Bucs would be ok to add another QB to their roster, "You need QBs, look what happened to us last year. Jake when down and then we had nothing." That's a confidence builder.

12:48 - The analysis about where Brady is going to go has broken down to Jon Gruden loving quarterbacks. Because of Gruden's love of QBs, they will take Brady Quinn even though they are paying 5 guys right now to play the position and are looking at Jake Plummer. The only other problem with this analysis is that Jon Gruden team has never taken a QB in the first round. Other than that, Quinn's a sure thing.

12:40 - This is GREAT! Cleveland takes Joe Thomas and Brady Quinn is not taking it well, plus my mock draft is 100% correct at the moment. Quinn looks like he wants to go up to the podium and grab the hat right out of Goodell's hand. He couldn't really look angrier. The next possible team to take him are the Skins at 6 and they are not likely to do it. Miami, Chicago and maybe Green Bay are teams that could move up into the 6th slot to grab him.

12:35 - Shot of Brady Quinn and his girlfriend and HOLY GOD is she busted (assuming that is his girlfriend he's got his arm around next to him). I had no idea Notre Dame was so bereft of female talent. She is the girlfriend talent equivalent of Brady Quinn. Looks good next to average competition, but when featured against top competition she looks like shit. She is one hour away from servicing Jimmy Clausen. Man, she is just awful.

12:31 - CJ is gone to the Lions and Keyshawn is sure that he's traded because Marinelli loves defensive players. That makes sense. Marinelli likes defensive players, Calvin Johnson is not a defensive player, therefore the Lions will trade him.

12:30 - Russell is gone and CJ should be next. The idea that the Lions can't take Johnson because of their previous draft day WR debacles is absurd. They should take CJ BECAUSE of those problems.

12:10 - I'm not sure if people outside of NY get the Crunch Gyms commercial series, but it's really disturbing. It features a bunch of claymation characters of different sizes and stereotypes doing weird things at Crunch Gyms usually resulting in one of the characters losing a limb or head. Just weird weird stuff. Here's one example.

12:25 - Lions are up, CJ is crying but there's some delay with the Lions pick. He's definitely gone, but he may not end up in Detroit. Trading CJ would be idiotic. The Lions have a need for a wide receiver BECAUSE they screwed up with their receiver picks.

12:15 - Russell is gone and there's a collective sigh of relief from Raider nation. The old man is not completely nuts.

12:08 - I don't really get the Reggie Bush Madden 2008 commercial on two levels: 1. Only one team passed on him, so thanking the "people" that passed on him doesn't really make sense; 2. Why does Madden need to start advertising now? Do you really think people are going to give up on the most popular video game ever and go with ESPN's shitty version or perhaps go retro and get back into Ten Yard Fight? Though, I guess since I'm talking about it, they've done their job. Stupid marketing geniuses....

11:58 - Possible trade in the works for the first pick. Cleveland wants Russell. This would be great for the Browns and is certainly a signal that Oakland is not sold on Russell, because they are morons. They seem to be ok with Brady Quinn or maybe they hope that Detroit passes on CJ and he slips to 3. I'll say this, if that is their hope, they're screwed because if Oakland trades their pick, the 2nd pick will SURELY be CJ whether Detroit takes him or not.

11:45 - I can't get over how much Goodell looks like Ted from the Holiday Inn "Business Guy" commercials. I know I've mentioned it before, but I really think the resemblance is uncanny.

11:30 - Already some serious technical difficulties. Mort sounded like he was reporting from the Snorks hometown of Snorkland (please go to this site if only to listen to the Snorks unbelievably unimaginative theme song "Come along with the Snorks. Play along with the Snorks.... If you could breathe underwater, where would you go?"). Then the camera refused to zoom in on Keyshawn as he was talking, so since Mort was still on camera, he couldn't mess with his mic, which made him very uncomfortable and fidgety. I really hope this is a sign of things to come.

11:10 - Michael Smith reported that the Raiders are going with Jamarcus Russell, but Ed Werder met with Lane Kiffin who denied Smith's report saying that they had not spoken with Russell or his representatives. Michael Smith then came back with a report, citing anonymous sources, that Ed Werder is ugly. Werder then broke the news that Michael Smith smells like shit. It's getting a little chippy in the early going.

1 comment:

rstiles said...

Good run down of the day....I was flipping between the Yanks and the Draft...

I agree, Michael Smith was right on with his views....I like Smith because he is not some former professional jock who thinks he knows everything just because he played the game...

The media need more journalists giving their views than some former jock