Monday, September 17, 2007

OJ's Robbery Defense Sounds Oddly Familiar

"Why would I shill roller skates? I'm OJ Simpson, I don't even skate!"

Even with the phyiscal evidence mounting, a ton of eye witness testimony and a leaked audio account of the incident (absolutely tremendous stuff), OJ is sticking with the line that worked for him when he murdered those two people: "Why would I do X? Wouldn't that make me look more guilty? It just doesn't make sense." In this case, OJ's line is "why would I enter a room with and retrieve my personal belongings with people carrying guns? I'm OJ Simpson. Do you really think I thought I could get away with it without anyone saying something?" Haven't we heard this before?
"Why would I kill my wife and her boyfriend? I have nothing to gain and wouldn't everyone immediately assume it was me?"

"Why would I leave a bloody glove on my property? Wouldn't that just cement my guilt?"

"Why would I try and avoid police in a low speed car chase? Wouldn't that seem to indicate that I was afraid of being caught and thus create an inference of my guilt?"

"Why would I write a book about how I would have committed the murders if I actually did commit them? Wouldn't that be in really bad taste?"
I guess it worked for him the first time, so why not recycle it? The only problem is that at that time, he had to convince 12 idiots and they bought it. A decade and change later, no one's buying it. Now when OJ incredulously asks, "Why would I do that? Do you think I'm that stupid?" The answer is an emphatic, "Yes".

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